Living a Daily Rhythm

My spiritual director is asking me to work on daily discipline. 

 

I love lists.  I love schedules, plans, and organizing mechanisms of all sorts.  I love to cross that little box and scratch out that little To-Do item.  But for some reason, my first reaction to her words last week was  - rebellion.  I didn't want to live each day by a list.  I didn't want to spend a certain amount of time in prayer, a certain amount of time exercising, a certain amount studying and working. 

 

 

The more I thought about it, the more I felt like life, with its momentary inspirations, feelings, impressions, would be locked into blocks of pre-planned, pre-scheduled time.  Would I become a robot?  Would I begin to lose who I am?

 

 

 

The word "Discipline" is a little scary that way.  It feels to me like forcing an order which isn't natural. 

 

But then I thought of a word that captured it better: Rhythm.  Getting my life into a daily rhythm.  Now, that isn't so bad.  That even sounds a little like music.

 

 

 

 

 

Out for a walk today, I was noticing how beautiful the leaves are at this time of year.  Especially in Minnesota, where Fall isn't just three days long.  Some of the trees are red, yellow and green at the same time, a natural sort of rainbow tree. 

 

 

Then it occurred to me how seasons can be appreciated because of this natural rhythm and order of time.  I love fall because of sweaters, hot cocoa, Halloween, dark houses lit up inside.  But then winter has its merits too - snow angels, snowmobiling (for my brother), gingerbread.  Nature isn't stifled by its rhythm; rather, the rhythm of the seasons enhances the beauty of each time. 

 

There are other rhythms, too, that give nature an order and a meaning, but also which enhance its beauty.  Tidal waves, for instance.  The presence of the golden mean. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Then what about me as a human being? Can my own life be enhanced by living in a certain rhythm?  When I am not living under the sway of impulses and feelings, but rather living a disciplined existence?  And even with "rhythm," can there still be room for inspiration, adventure, impulses?

 

 

Here are a few things I've noticed:

 

*Now that I am exercising daily, I can feel that I am making progress.  I can feel my muscles getting more toned and am increasing endurance.  Knowing that I am making progress gives me a sense of purpose and joy.  Life feels like it has direction and is leading somewhere good.

 

*I don't feel like exercising every day, but I do anyway (most of the time).  I am conscious that my willpower is growing, and this is also an overall gain.  I am happy knowing that I can make goals and keep them.

 

*Making daily time for prayer has given me a focus to each day and a sense of direction.  God seems close and a part of each day, not just an afterthought.  This time for prayer and silence causes me to consider how to treat others, greater self knowledge and opens me up to necessary changes.

 

*Daily habits, like exercise, have opened my life up to unexpected joys.  When I watch Netflix or browse Facebook all day, I tend to feel sluggish and gross by the end of the day.  On my walk the other day, I noticed some really beautiful things that brought me a sense of awe and wonder.  I realized that in loving myself enough to make this daily habit, my life is opening up to receive joy. 

 

*Though discipline is hard, the overall results have been good (sense of purpose and direction, joy, gratitude, belief in myself).  These effects build me up rather than keep me down, and help me in turn to build others up.