Just at that time some Pharisees approached, saying to Him, "Go away, leave here, for Herod wants to kill You." And He said to them, "Go and tell that fox, 'Behold, I cast out demons and perform cures today and tomorrow, and the third day I reach My goal.' "Nevertheless I must journey on today and tomorrow and the next day; for it cannot be that a prophet would perish outside of Jerusalem." (Luke 13:31-33)
So when he heard that Lazarus was sick, he stayed where he was two more days, and then he said to his disciples, “Let us go back to Judea.” “But Rabbi,” they said, “a short while ago the Jews there tried to stone you, and yet you are going back?” Jesus answered, “Are there not twelve hours of daylight? Anyone who walks in the daytime will not stumble, for they see by this world’s light. It is when a person walks at night that they stumble, for they have no light.” (John 11: 6-10)
For the past two weeks, regardless of how I have opened my Bible, I have turned directly to these two passages several times. Jesus' responses to both situations have been puzzling me and challenging me.
The disciples are looking at the bare facts - Jesus was in danger of his life when in Judea. Keeping Jesus alive is important if his message is to be heard, if people are to be healed and cured. Therefore - avoid the places where he will be stoned, right? Their decision making is both practical and prudent.
And Jesus says these two things that completely baffle me. In the first passage, he seems to understand that death is coming, and yet he says, "I must cast out demons today and tomorrow." His composure and quietude of spirit are completely not normal. He almost seems annoyed at Herod for disrupting him in his work of today and tomorrow.
I was trying to relate this to my own life, imagining if I heard on a Monday, "On Wednesday you are going to die in a terrible car accident." And, rather than freaking out about this and dreading it, I simply said, "Today and tomorrow, my work is to teach piano lessons, tidy the house and visit a friend." That would be crazy in many ways, just to go about today's work without letting the finalizing work of Wednesday affect and change the work of today....wouldn't it??
In the second passage, the disciples are telling him that he should cancel his plans to visit Martha and Mary after Lazarus's death, because he himself will die at the hands of the Jews.
And he responds that those who walk in the light will not stumble. I don't know what he means, really. Maybe he means that the Father has made it clear that he is to go to Judea, and because he trusts the Father, he entrusts the outcome of the journey to Him. Or he may mean that he is not afraid to make the journey to Judea because he knows this is not the hour of his death.
Why is Jesus' response to these two situations so strange to me?
1. Even in the face of death, he lacks fear
2. He appears to be acting recklessly and foolishly in light of the facts.
How many things we do in everyday life as a response to our fears of the future! Weather forecasts, newspapers, insurance of all kinds, extended warranties, backup plans, political projections. We learn to read facial expressions, to read actions, to feel the weather coming on in our bones, to notice trends. We learn to withhold ourselves, to make only safe bets, to avoid risk.
Really, the disciples are only doing just that, to Jesus. They are looking at the signs. They are gathering information from the streets. Their motives are good - protection of the world's greatest treasure. And what is wrong with this way of acting?
But they are letting their actions be determined by fear - fear of death, fear that Jesus will not be able to complete his mission.
And this fear would lead only to hiding. Hiding from death. Hiding from enemies. Hiding from the mission. This fear would lead only to being controlled by death, being controlled by fear, controlled by enemies.
"Each day has enough trouble of its own". "Give us this day our daily bread." Jesus's words at other times tell me that fear distracts us from our present, daily work. Fear turns our minds and hearts away from God's providence, causing us to stockpile our own safety nets and backup plans. A pure trust in God, a detachment from the world, allow us to let go of these fears and walk freely in today, whatever the next day will bring.
(Sidenote: I looked up google images of 'Worry" - almost all of the pictures were of people hovered over, covering their heads in their hands, clenching their jaws. It struck me that worry closes us up - we close our eyes, tighten our bodies in fear. The opposite stance to worry would be openness - open eyes, open expressions. Walking freely forward. And this is what Jesus was doing all along.)
